Recently I met the gruff side of myself. He doesn’t mind going by “Gruff Johnny”. I visualize him as someone who drinks a lot of beer and throws the cans around his small home. He’s a down to earth kind of guy, who only supports what’s necessary, and has his doubts about all kinds of fanaticism and crazy desires. He also drops the F-bomb alot, telling me things like “Calm the **** down already.” when I get too worked up about this or that. Hmm, let me try staging a conversation. Gruff Johnny, is there anything you’d like to tell my friends on Facebook?

“Go hug your loved ones and stop treating me like a ****ing sideshow. I keep to myself for a reason, you know?”

Um, anything else?

“Nope.”

Ok that didn’t go well. Anyway, I can ask this side of me for advice and worldly wisdom at any time, and it’s been quite helpful, since I am kind of frenetic at times, going here and there and wondering what I should do. I feel like there’s more to say.

“Listen, just what are you trying to accomplish here?”

Well, I want to say something profound, to share with everyone.

“Well I ain’t got anything profound to say, alright?”

Ah well, you guys get the idea.